Getting Dumped

Sometimes I think about my dating history and how many guys dumped me… I’d like to say for an array of reasons but it was usually just the same old reason.


I have the desperate creepy vibe. It beams out of me.
It’s cool, I’ve made peace with the vibe.
Because no matter how much “cool-chic” perfume you try and disguise it with.. Men will always sniff out the desperado creep vibe.
I like to consider myself a bit of an expert on getting dumped.

-Some guys like to do the “righty” and dump you face to face, it’s rare but it happens. The whole, “I’m just too busy for a relationship” thing which is sweet, until you notice them moving in with a new girlfriend the following week..

-Some guys like to do it via text, I know that this is gutless but I never minded it, if I’m going to be dumped I’d kind of like to be able to shove food/vodka/valium in my mouth and cry like a bitch instead of hold back my tears and get hives with the stress of trying to look like you think breaking up is a great idea too, you’re not having a nervous breakdown inside. at. all.

-Some guys do nothing, like Houdini their way out of a year long relationship, where you and your mates assume he must have past away suddenly. This really brings out my inner desperado creep vibe with endless messages, drive bys and “popping” up at their work.. “Babe!!! It’s me!!! Still on for Thursday night blow jobs right???? I think I have crabs.. Are you Itchy? I brought us a puppy!!!” High fiving myself- nobody ignores a Queenie πŸ‘Š

-Some guys dump you when dumping is really unnecessary, like the morning after a 1 night stand when they roll over and tell you that it’s not working out, they are too busy right now for a GF bla bla bla. Snore face emoji hovers over my head. 😴😴

And some guys are so completely mental and fucked up and crazy, with such a deeply creepy desperate vibe too….. That they don’t dump you at all.

And in your own creepy little way you all go on to live happily ever after 😘

Con πŸ’—πŸ‘‘πŸ’…πŸ‘Š

  1. Profile photo of Twin flame
    Twin flame 12 months ago

    Love this! So needed to read this. You have reminded me that there is a beautiful man out there who will love me and accept me for all that i am and all I will be xx

  2. Profile photo of Tasha
    Tasha 12 months ago

    I definitely used to give off the creepy, tries too hard, stalker, in love in a millisecond, will sleep with you to keep you, kind of vibe!
    I married someone who I was obsessed with, convinced myself he was amazing, nahhhhh turned out he was just an alcoholic wanker who treated me like shit.
    Ten years,one child and a pending divorce later I wonder if it was all down to my creepy weird clingon vibe?
    I don’t think it is, I still am like that, but I’ve got a crazy fiancΓ© who actually feels the same way back and we are creepy loved up peeps together.

  3. Profile photo of jac7star
    jac7star 7 months ago

    Argh…. just had my own houdini. Fucker. Fair enough I am wanty (not needy) in that I like him to reply to my one per day text message and I want him in my bed daily! BUT he was the one that told his bestie he could be the god father to our child, should we have one…. and that I no longer need birth control….. (that escalated quickly!)
    And the last fucker who suggested I move in at the 6 month mark – only to decide less than 12 HOURS later that it was just sex for him…..
    It’s hilarious. And maddening. And a lot freakin sad.

  4. Profile photo of Emily Lewis
    Emily Lewis 4 months ago

    I love this! I have a 12 month relationship with a guy who one minute is tells me he wants me to be his everything and the next minute has his mum come and stay so please don’t come around for a week and then tells me (and all his mates) that I am over-reacting when I get upset and that I am crazy!! Thankfully I found a book which explains exactly this kind of stuff, describing these guys as ‘crazymakers’. Patricia Evans book, ‘The verbally abusive relationship’ really helped me to understand it all and realise his 180 degree flips were not my imagination and my confusion and upset were perfectly reasonable. It is normal to feel confused, disoriented and thrown off balance in when this stuff happens. Interestingly, this book describes how verbal abuse is much more than just name calling, it includes words that attack or injure, that cause one to believe the false, or that speak falsely of one. It is psychological abuse.

  5. Profile photo of Jen
    Jen 4 months ago

    Constance, you are the BEST. A true life saver with your funny clever honest posts. I have needed this breath of fresh air for years. And yes i have had more than my share of bad relationship experiences. I am going to share your blog with my friend who is going through a brutal divorce. It will cheer her up I think. Thank you so much for being you and for giving peace and laughter to so many women. This is truly your calling :). j

  6. Profile photo of Evija Preijere
    Evija Preijere 3 months ago

    Get a woman 😚

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